Polar Bear's Go Grrrrr I Go???

Bye Everyone

2005-12-01T21:11:00.000+08:00

Hey everyone that comes here.....

Just saying goodbye till christmas, going to the army tomorrow morning.

everyone take care.

sorry didn't blog in a while i will when i return.

BYE

How sad....just like in the movies....

2005-11-22T09:29:00.000+08:00

Was on the train the other day coming back from work.... as usual the train is fairly crowded. there was one girl that caught my eye not because she was like cute or anything but cos she was like standing in the middle of the door way with no one by her side, she was just standing there with her ear phone, looking at the ground. what caught my eye bout her was that when the train stopped she just refused to move! and bascially blocked the entrance, and people leaving and trying to get into it were having to squeeze past her, and even if people bumbed into her she just wouldn't move, she just stood her ground. The first thing that came to my head was that, i made a judgement about her, i thought about the way her personality would be like, how she was brought up all sorts of things, then i thought about what PS Kong was saying in the sermon last sunday. How we should avoid making judgements and especially don't speak of it to others. I could help but feel a bit guilty. Anyway as people began to leave i got to see the bigger picture, funny how we all make so many judgements without seeing the Big Picture.... applies here and applies to everyday life. When people cleared out i finally saw the boy leaning against the glass side panel also looking down at the ground. the next stop just happened to be his stop. when the doors opened, it was as if time slowed down to me. i saw him slowly stand straight from leaning against the panel, and just before he walked out, he looked up into the girls eyes, she was already staring at him, through those glasses mounted on her nose. For that split moment a whole story could be told, the look in her eyes were so sad, you could see the plead in her eyes as she look at this boy, but only to be returned by a cold stare, then the back of his head.

When the boy had left, she took his place leaning against the side panel. i watched on as she leaned against it, arms folded, giving this cold scornful look. The saddest part was watching her, seeing her with all her pride, all her coldness, all her strength slowly decay away.... i watched as slowly tears deep within slowly pushed its way through her icy heart and out her eyes. you could see in her face how she was trying to hard to hold back the tears that were pouring down her face, see all her pride pushed to its limit, but over come by the emotions that were overbearing.

It was sad just wathcing her, watching him. I don't know them and i don't know their story, but it happens every where, every day, people getting hurt here and there.

Other than that little story, just last sunday(20th Nov) we had a great service and then we had the Zone games! EXPODITION! was really good fun, but really tiring lol, but really cool fellowshipping with our group.

thats all for now..........

The way we were......

2005-11-15T18:05:00.000+08:00

Past week has been, tough to say the least..... feeling down about alot of things... even though many people won't see it.... quite funny how so much of a person is always hidden, even from their friends. for someone that seems happy and on top of the world could really be burning on the inside, feeling daggers piercing through their heart.... even for the saddest of people, where really in their hearts they have immense joy, yet don't show it because of a fear of something....

It seems that when life gets tough, it doesn't seem to let up, it only get tougher and tougher... people curse God blame him for all that is happening. but we bring this upon our selves. and when GOd seeks us to help us, we turn our backs, thinking we know better.

it times like these, when u feel like everything is falling apart, when life is on the edge, that you should seek god, because for one god can help you in the impossible, and second what else have you got! To say all this is easy, but seeking refuge in God, having faith in him that everything will end up ok is incredibly hard, knowing that believing in him will result in a blessed future. it ain't easy to just give everything to the lord. Pastors, cell group leaders will say that we all should give all to the lord, release all pain and suffering to the lord, which is so true, but! they say that because it is wat is needed to be said, but saying is one part, doing is another.... walking through the firey pits, to stand before god will surely burn u....

In these trying times who is there to seek guidance, to understand the pain and suffering. Who would god send? would go send anyone... faith is all that i have.... and in God i'll have faith.

Photos of old and new.....

2005-11-10T23:52:00.000+08:00

Meaning of Our names:

2005-11-09T00:15:00.000+08:00

These are my family members:Eric(Dad) and Elaine(Mum), Anthony, Ben, Calvin, David

interesting to see what all the names mean:

Eric:
Origin: Scandinavian, Old Norse
Meaning: "Complete ruler."
Scandinavian legend relates that the Viking sea rover Ericson (son of Eric the Red) landed on the shores of America 500 years before Christopher Columbus. The name was not widely used among English-speaking people until 19th-century British fiction writers Frederic Farrar (in "Eric", or "Little by Little") and H. Rider Haggard (in "Eric Brighteyes") used it in popular literature. Eriq is the French spelling; Erich is a popular German form.

Elaine:
Origin: French
Meaning: "Shining light."
Elaine is a variant of Helen. Mythology: the abduction of Zeus's mortal daughter, Helen of Troy, resulted in the Trojan War. Hers was "the face that launched a thousand ships." There was a Saint Helena, mother to Constantine the Great, whose purity allowed her to discover the True Cross. Helene (hel-LANE) is a French form; Halina is Polish.
Anthony:
Origin: Latin
English form of the old Roman family name Antonius, probably of Etruscan origin. Mark Anthony (82-30 B.C.), Roman triumvir and general, shared a throne and a tempestuous political career with Queen Cleopatra of Egypt. Saint Anthony (third century) was an Egyptian hermit monk who founded the first Christian monastic order and is traditionally renowned for his resistance to the devil. According to legend, he lived alone in the wilderness for over 80 of his hundred-some years.

Benjamin:
Origin: Hebrew
Meaning: "Son of the right hand; son of the south; son of my old age."
Biblical: the 12th, youngest and most beloved son of the patriarch Jacob and Rachel. In the Middle Ages, it was often given to sons whose mothers had died in childbirth, though it has no such connotations today. Brought into use by the Puritans until the end of the 19th century. After several decades of disuse, came back to great popularity by the 1970s.

Calvin:
Origin: French
Meaning: "Little bald one."
Diminutive of "calve", from French "chauve." A Roman family clan name turned surname. Transferred to a first name as homage to 16th-century French religious reformer Jean Calvin, whose thinking deeply influenced the Presbyterian, Methodist, and Huguenot branches of Protestantism.

and Lastly....

David:
Origin: Hebrew
Meaning: "Beloved."
Biblical: one of the most remarkable personalities in the Scriptures. David was a shepherd, musician, poet, soldier, statesman, prophet, and king. He wrote about half of the Psalms and very likely composed music for them as well. He is the only David mentioned in the Bible; his name occurs there more than a thousand times. Today there are variants of the name in almost every language group. Saint David (sixth century) is the patron saint of Wales. In Scotland, David was a royal name.

What does your name mean?

What truth hurts the world.....

2005-11-08T17:39:00.000+08:00

past few days been caught up in a lot of stuff, work, and other stuff, so kinda tired. Whole weekend was doing things so just killed me, plus the week before filled with work, but heh atleast i'm doing something, better than just sitting around wasting away day by day :D

anyway something thats been bugging me not just for the past few days but along time i guess. can't really say wat it is here, cos this is kinda public, but its bascially to do with telling the truth.
Whats been going through my mind is that, if you understood something, or knew something about someone would you tell that person or tell everyone about it? What if it the knowledge that we possessed was potentially damaging but also potentially enlightening? who can you tell? When should you tell if ever?

For one its always really stupid to lie to someone cos its just not right, but how justify a lie if it was to help someone or result in a greater good. in our small world lie like this person hates this person as an example is very small compared to larger scale things like global lie that results in wars. but the fact still remains that lying is lying, no matter how big the lie is the concept is still the same, as a result the end may be good or bad. just like wars end badly or good. but wars are started to end wars or find a peace at the end of the road. Ironic huh! One of the few ways to end violence is with violence its self. similarly the concept is that world leaders cause wars to find a peace at the end, they do bad for a greater good, so is lying to one another ok if there is a greater good intended? some people would say yes that its for a better cause, but who are you to decide who gets hurt by the lie and who doesn't? we aren't God!

anyway thats just a little for now..... got more work to do
night everyone...... gotta start training army coming up! bye bye freedom

BBQ Galore!

2005-11-04T13:04:00.000+08:00

this is a quick blog..... past like week have had 2 bbq's :D very good fun hehe, first bbq was a big cell group thing lots of games, so was a realyl good night. then the 2nd bbq was just eating left over chicken wings and astuff from the first bbq lol cos we didn't have time to cook everything! but we nearly finished all the chicken left in the 2nd bbq, was a really good night! great being with fellow E316ers!

yesterday was Hari Raya so good to relax. played tennis in the morning with Shu Hui, Selena, Jason and Jeremy but had breakfast before hand yumm yumm. after that went to Bro Tan's house to get Charcoal for bbq, got an sms from my brothers getting me to do some work, argh.... abit annoying but had to be done, Shu Hui, Jason, Selena and Jeremy all thought i was really upset, but i wasn't sorry bout that guys just had to think about how to get the work done :D but PRAISE GOD all ended up ok so happy, (Thanks Shu Hui for the sms, made me feel better)

Thats all for now Cya

When is enough enough!!!

2005-10-31T18:31:00.000+08:00

argh! just when u think someone can be different than when u knew them before, changed in some way for the better, they go and just destroy any last hope u have in that person.
when u have believed them when they said ok, and planned around only to find out not long before its time that the person has gone somewhere else! wat can you do, no matter how much they put u through, no matter how much pain they inflict, they will never really know wat they do to people, intentional i don't know. i just know that ain't the best way to live.

after some time of this when do u just give up, do you ever give up, wats the point of giving chances and chances if all they do is slap u in the face, turn the other cheek people say, sure turn the other cheek but thats when they are doing it out of their own self begin mean, and not when you give of your self then they slap you. *sigh*

for those who say that, you should never give up and continue to give your goodness to those who slap you in the face, i say to you all this verse:

Matthew 7:6
Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you.

At some point you just simply say enough, and rid ur self of all to do with them or it, sometimes its for the best even if it hurts to let go, wat must be done, must be done, whether being, a person or habit.

Days gone by....

2005-10-30T23:06:00.000+08:00

well past few days have gone, havne't really had time to blog sorry.....

on friday found out that i was bringing chicken wings to the BBQ the next day! so kinda had to rush and get all the things sorted and figure out the prices, but got it done anyway. In the morning played Golf at Tanah Merah was really good, but lost money to JC *sigh* uncle taking all my money :P. was unfair was giving him a stroke every single hole! which means i had to beat him by 2 strokes everyone hole just to win!! unfair!

on sat morning drove with lucas to Kim's house and picked Kim, her mum (who is really nice if anyone hasn't met her yet!), her sister (who really does look like her!) and her brother who went to thailand for a holiday. the brother ben didn't end up going though, but i'm sure they are enjoying their holiday! i wish i was on holiday too :(
after that planned to go to Nanyang medical to give blood, but i had a cold in the morning :( so can't give blood so sad, wanted to give blood always miss out, well next time i will be there!
on sat evening we had our CG bbq which was really good, but absolutely tired me out so much! just fell asleep straight away when i got home.

Today had service and was all about relationships, with the our friends, relationships with pastors, and thing slike that was really interesting, and strange cos just before the pastor told the congregation about wat the sermon was about, i just thought to my self, he is going to talk about relationships! bless the HS huh! freaked me out, but i knew it was the work of the HS so AMEN :D

After service we went to coffee shop and had lunch, then went to bible study with bro tan and melanie joined us yay! and also found out there is a test on the book at the end :S wah finish school and still got testing lol. after bible study went to joing adam and lucas and the rest to go play basketball, they were all playing a game already so a few of us played our own little 3 on 3.
a bit of a hot day to play basketball though hehe.... sweat sweat sweat!

anyway before i go, for all those who are interesting in studying the bible, and ever come across the ideas of Tithing i've found some interesting things, and a interesting websites, but ALOT of reading, but very vyer interesting, in a way challenges nearly every single church in the world, but if u can think about it logically in terms of reality and human relations then it makes sense.

but for now:

In order to determine whether or not Christians must tithe, we obviously need to study what Scripture tells us about tithing. What makes our job easier is the fact that the Old Testament Law of Moses (with its commandments and regulations) was completely abolished and canceled at the cross.

interesting! Night everyone!

Lost for words....

2005-10-26T21:31:00.000+08:00

well just felt like bloggin but don't really know wat to blog about......

well this sat is coming the cell group's BBQ at Lucas' house, i don't really have anyone to invite :( y does everyone have to be in perth *sigh*. JC might be coming, so we shall see how, tried to talk to my cuz, but somethin is up her *)@# so can't really talk to her...... but then again everyone deserves a 2nd chance, so i'll keep trying i guess. HUMPH.

past few days have just been alone in my house, cos all my brothers are in perth along with my parents, so its just me and the maid, but rarely see the maid, cos i'm at work then when i come back i'm out for a run then shower, then have dinner by then she is asleep. i guess i like it, being alone, time to think, don't have people doing something, or wathcing tv, nice to just sit in quiet and think for a while, don't really get to do that these days.

its funny how just small words can make such an impact on an outcome of an event or the way people react to you. it can be there difference between someone trusting you or the person just becoming an acquaintance. but when you do have that person that trusts you its an incredible feeling, know someone trusts u with wat they say, putting their trust knowing that you could tell everyone else, but hoping that you won't. everyone needs someone to talk to, just so few people to trust, so much deceit, so much hate its hard to find someone to put their deepest secrets to. but when you can't find someone upon this earth to tell, you can tell God, he already knows, but u got to go to him to help u.

here are some lyrics to a song by 3 Doors Down. The words are really nice

I hope you're doing fine out there without me
'Cause I'm not doing so good without you
The things I thought you'd never know about me
Were the things I guess you always understood
So how could I have been so blind for all these years?
Guess I only see the truth through all this fear,And living without you...

And everything I had in this world
And all that I'll ever be
It could all fall down around me.
Just as long as I have you,Right here by me.

I can't take another day without you
'Cause baby, I could never make it on my own
I've been waiting so long, just to hold you
And be back in your arms where I belong

Sorry I can't always find the words to say
But everything I've ever know gets swept away Inside of your love...

And everything I had in this world
And all that I'll ever be
It could all fall down around me.
Just as long as I have you, Right here by me.

As the days grow long I see
That time is standing still for me
When you're not here

Sorry I can't always find the words to say
But everything I've ever know gets swept away Inside of your love...

And everything I had in this world
And all that I'll ever be
It could all fall down around me.
Just as long as I have you,Right here by me.

And everything I had in this world
And all that I'll ever be
It could all fall down around me.
Just as long as I have you,Right here by me.

Night Everyone..... Find that someone to trust, you won't regret it.

Perth Last Trip

2005-10-25T22:22:00.000+08:00

Darts anyone????
Bro #3 cutting some wood........
Shogun driving our car VROOM VROOM!!

Change your thoughts and you change your world.

2005-10-20T23:15:00.000+08:00

In this day and age, we've come along way from our past, moved on from wars, built our perception on life in a different way, but things still remain the same, but time will change, everything changes its just a matter of time, what we do is change the way we think and bring about these changes quicker by the way we look on our lives.

People have issues within them selves, still burning, still tearing them apart deep inside, never letting go. But we have a choice to live a life of purpose, to change from who we were to the person we are to become. I read in a friend's blog about how this couple adopted a few black children, and the eldest was 19 years old and on his 19th birthday he was killed by 5 english teenagers because he wouldn't fight them. Have we not learnt from our mistakes in the past, have we forgotten Martin Luther. Why is there still racism in the world, its because people stil hang on to their troubles deep within them, they find a way to release their anger, some turn to violence some turn to the sight of the bottom of empty bottles hoping their worries will wash away.

If we simply brush our troubles aside, praying to God that they will disappear, and everything will turn out ok in the end, we have been given freedom of choice by God, and we are responsible for the choices we make, so do we stand aside and watch the black kid get murdered for simply being black? Do we sit at bars watching people washing their problems down as we do our own? When do we make the change? When do we make the choice?

We can choose to live a life of misery feeling sorry for your self, cursing the world for making you poor, for taking your family away, for making you be born black. but how does that make your life any better? how does that put a purpose in your life? When we find our selves, find out what makes us happy, who makes us happy, and seek it, then our lives can move on, all isn't as bad as you may think, there are alot more poeple worse off that are happy. Life isn't about what u can hold in your hands, but what you can hold in your heart, whats in your hands can be taken away, but the memory, the feeling, the love in your heart will remain with you forever, even at the table beyond the pearly gates.

Don't live a life of past mistakes, God gives us a second change, will you give your self a second chance, or even a chance, He will be with you every step of the way, we just got to open our eyes and see the potential that lays before us, with God in hand, nothing is impossible.

BOWLING!!!

2005-10-17T01:00:00.000+08:00

hahaha i always seem to be blogging for 1 day before :S

but yeah this is for sunday. Service was really good abut 7 ways to enchance your annointing! very interesting to listen to. After service we went to the coffee shop to have lunch yumm yumm. And celebrated Pei Jun's Birthday hehehe we didn't know wat to get her, but we knew she LOVED Mickey Mouse so we got a really nice Mickey Mouse Giordano T-shirt!!

After lunch Bro Tan gave me and JJ bible study lesson :D which is like my first BS but not really cos i had one before, but was a long long long time ago, and for some reason i think i did the same lesson again :s but so long ago that i can't rememeber hehe, but now i got the book so i can remember :P

After BS we went to the Cafe at church and sat(stood) around and chatting, then Stan decided to go see if anyone wanted to go bowling :D, wat a great idea huh! i hadn't been blowing in like AGES. anyway ended up it was me, stan, Adam, Swee Min, Nat, Clara and JJ. so we all left off to go to the bus stop but of course raining and of course girls must be girls and complain and complain :P so we had to find umbrellas for them cos they don't want to get wet. after about 10 minutes of standing around debating about who takes who in which umbrella we started walking towards the bus stop. hopped on to the bus and on our way to boon lay. when get there we had to decide which bowling alley to go to, cos Stan said go to Yishun which is like soooo far away, ended up we decided to go to the SAFRA one next to IMM, abit pricey at 3.80 per game but the lady gave us the special of 3.40 which little bit cheap hehe, ended up playing 3 games but at the end of the first game, from bowling my thumb kinda split open so started to bleed :s but only a little bit and only a small cut but a bit pain to bowl, but how can resist bowling hehe.
i think in the end "Stan the Man" won started off a bit shakey but wah but 3 game we was strike strike strike strike!!! and also JJ very fierce in his bowling! and "Adam the Duckie" also did ok but got same score as me on the last round!! and on the last bowl i only got 9! if i got the spare i would have won him! darn. anyway last but not least was Swee Min, wah very very very funny to watch her lol. she like does a cat walk up to the line then swings but when she swings she is already stationary hehehe so she practically falls over ehehehe. very good nights entertainment. Nat and clara just sat around and laughed along. after we finished bowling the girls wanted to play pool lol, but first took photos don't ahve them with me so can't post :(. anyway Stan and JJ went home first so just left me, adam, nat, clara and swee min. played pool for a while and put our hands in the pockets so we would catch the balls so could play another game hehe, wat, it was very ex! $2 per game. so must make the most of it hehehe. by the time we finished was already so late :S. so when we got to the train station it was already coming to 11pm. and Swee min lives all the way in Bedok which is 19 stops from Jurong East mrt! so kinda late took her home, adam wanted to come along but his dad already calling so must tell him to go home, Clara and Nat was ok to go home by them selves cos they got each other, but Swee Min all by her self. anyway cos already so late i could only take her to Raffles Mrt station, well some stops better than none. anyway just caught the train as i got off the first train, and Swee Min got home safely :D, but the time i reached Clementi mrt station it was about 11:57 which means there is only 1 last bus that goes to where i live! so had to rush and just caught the last bus at 12:00am hehe whew thanks God always on time ;)

anyway arm is really sore from bowling and thumb too :(, but well worth it for a day out with CG friends hehe.

Best be off, so take care everyone!

Hope......

2005-10-16T00:29:00.000+08:00

Well its sunday right now, but i'm blogging for saturday. but just to note today (Sunday 16th October) is PeiJun's Birthday yayayay!!! so all those who know her give her a sms or a call and wish her a happy birthday!

anyway today we had CG was good, cos CG is always good. but started off the day with a good sleep in... woke up at 12:30 to be exact :D. always enjoy a good sleep in hehehe. pity all those guys in exam period waking up early at like 5 in the morning to start studying.. oh well for all those peope out there i'll sleep a couple extra hours just for u :D

after i woke up, just chilled at home and set up my computer again, so i can blog now! but after that at 5:30 went over to Lucas' house for CG, didn't start till 6:30 but a few people were already there, so we all sat around playing the guitar. but geez singapore sooooo hot!!! but thank God got air con :D
anyway CG main message was about "The Prayer of Faith" was really interesting cos we talked about how faith is based on Hope. so i lives revolve on the Hope we have within us. and the interesting is that what we hope in is limited by our imagination. and since we are creations of God and made in his image, our imagination has no limits. so in life in the things we do and the things we want, even if they seem so far away, or so impossible or just don't seem right, if you have the hope, u can have the faith in God that he will provide, and in all things you do, you know he would want the best for you in the long run not the short run, cos we have his unconditional love. But what we need is the courage to take that step of faith, to have that glimer of hope in what we want and believe in, if we dont ahve that then all is lost, but we still have free will so the decisions are up to us.

well best be off got church tomorrow morning!! and of course celebrating PeiJun's birthday (shoosh don't think many people knew about it :S) Night everyone.

God Forgives, So can I, But can i Forgive Myself.....

2005-10-12T13:43:00.000+08:00

As life goes on, we make mistakes, do things we regret, but we are taught to forgive. I feel i'm able to forgive people for the wrong they have done to me, as i would want them to forgive me. but how do you forgive your self, people say that when you've done things u regret, and it takes time to heal, but wat if deep down you don't want to forgive ur self for the wrong you have done, so you never ever do it again, you want to burn deep inside so u could never do it again. Is that wrong?

In Time, things will change, even time will change.

2005-10-10T01:16:00.000+08:00

I haven't blogged in a while :S sorry... but here it is..

well on friday i finally left perth for a while, was hard to say goodbye to Rie and Marian....... although didn't seem sad, i was dying inside, but meeting them has changed my life alot, made me realise alot in my mind, about the person i want to be, the person i should be. Living my life to be that person is alot harder than just saying it, but i know with friends like them and the wisdom of God, if i truly in my heart want to be that man, then nothing in this world, no power of the devil could ever stand in my way. if i'm struck down, i will rise, if i'm blinded, i'll hold God's hand, because i know what i endure in this life time, is nothing compared to what Jesus endured in his life time, and if he can be happy and forgive then i shall try to walk in his path, for at the end of the tunnel the grass is ever so greener, and the air is ever so fresher.

Saturday was a bit of a slacking day. Not sure what to do now that i'm in singapore, chilled out at home, and went over to Adam's place for a the beginning of cell group, relaly wished i could have stayed longer, miss the group alot. after staying for the beginning of cg went to my bro's birthday dinner at Brazil, was reallly really goooooooood and really really filling. geez they just pile and pile the meat on ur plate, just wouldn't stop coming. only prob was kinda pricey, so had to eat ur money's worth right!!! kinda funny huh u pay so much to eat till u feel sick hehe. anyway after being filled with assorted meats and vegies, we had the cake cutting, but the Brazil staff sang my brother a birthday song. so we were all set up ready to sing the traditional Happy Birthday song, and when they began they started singing some Brazilian song!!! i was like er....... ok then..... anyway cake was cute, really yummm hehehe...

Sunday fianlly came! today which is actually yesterday hehe cos its past 12 already hehe. but finally got to go back to church and see all my cg members, and sit in the auditorium and makes ur heart tremble and soul soar with the presence of God. always the greatest thing to worship God with so many people, feeling the HS flowing through the people. Anyway the message today was done by a paster from sweden, he was really really good and funny. best way to bring the word to people :D humor is a divine language that all enjoy :) The message was about changes. the main idea was about how everything we can see, touch and smell is subject to change, BUT God's word is constant, never changing.

2 Corinthians 4:18: So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

This message really hit me, because so many things has been happening, to me and to people around me. How no matter what we do now, what we did, what we have created, what we have wanted, it is all subject to change. we don't know how it will change, and what will change, but we do know that it is all able to change. Things we have done or said before this day push us into a life we do not want to live, but it is subject to change, just because it happened before doesn't mean it will happen again, just because we did drugs or got drunk or partied everyday, doesn't mean we have to live like that for the rest of our lives, if we commit our selves to God with the honest attempt to change, God will do the rest, all he requires is the obedience to take the step and step in the path to him. With our financial troubles, everyone has financial troubles some are to embarrased to say it, some willing to seek help, but no matter what has happened before, wrong decision made that puts u in the position u are in, it will only last for so long, because it will change, BUT......... Keep in mind, God uses as as tools for his will, he lives through us and his will be done on earth as it is in heaven through our deeds. This means that we cannot stand around and wait for a miracle to happen. even in a service where a blind person gains their sight. they do not simply stand around and viola they see! they take a step of faith, and the pastor does something by praying and having the faith in God to empower the pastor with the miracle. We have to move in line with God, change our life style to be inline with the life we want to live, make the decisions to change our financial situations. Its all about cause and effect. we must cause the change, want the change and have the faith, and God will meet u more than half way.

Thats all my thoughts for tonight. Till next time Good night all.

The final week has come about.....

2005-10-04T02:01:00.000+08:00

well past few days have been different, a lot of things have been happening, like family issues and stuff, and me tryign to figure out who i am trying to be and who i'm wanting to be, and i'm glad to have friends like Marian and Rie who are there for me to talk to, and open up to them.

On a happy note, Marian has found her self a bit of a companion, hon if ur reading this sooooo happy for u, he makes u happy so i'm happy for u! take care of him, and don't spike him to much! Ha Maid Marian and Robin Hood in his tights :P

anyway this is the last week i'm here left in perth, kinda sad to leave, really don't want to leave my friends behind, so many i didn't get to see, so many i didn't get to talk to. but maybe another time. friends for a lifetime i hope. but wat hurts the most is saying goodbye to people so close to u, closer that u can imagine. for one i don't know how i would say goodbye, and two i don't know if i really could bring my self to say those words, as my mind pulls my self in two directions.
i'll miss everyone here, but i miss everyone in singapore too! geez so hard life is..........

as a going away present a close close friend gave me a poem which i treasure with all my heart, its one of the nicest things ever given to me in my life! not just the material thing that was given to me but the thought and care put to it. its entitled "Only For a Moment"

In Time to come
We Recall not days, but
Moments

And Breaking the monotony
Of modern life

Taking time to look back on
Bygone days

But only for a moment

no words could express how happy this present makes me feel, no amount of gifts could account for the priceless thoughts put into this gift. its something i will treasure for eternity, and i thank god for giving me a friend so close to me.

Night everyone (see all you CG members soon!!! friday i come back yay!!)

As the days count down....

2005-09-28T18:20:00.000+08:00

well i've only got about a week and a bit left then i'm back in singapore :D... everyone in singapore i'm coming home. everyone in perth i'm gonna miss u guys soo much especially my special 2, u girls know who u are :).

past few days been working my butt off during the day so i can get the nights off free hehe. tomorrow night is late night shopping so might be able to go shopping with Rie and Marian i hope.... only a few outings left, but of course there is church on friday and the nightlife thing on saturday and of course church on sunday hehehee might be going for the morning service this time :D i think my mum wants to.

well i'm lost of words hehehe dunno wat to blog about now. well the weather here has been nice, but at night its really really windy :S, everything banging everywhere. our poor dog gets scared alot hehehe. but erm... other than that. summer is coming so the day time is getting hotter and hotter when its not raining hehe.

My sound is stuffed on my comp :( so i guess i'd better get it fixed up hate freakin software when it stuffs up, all ur fault Microsoft! :P

Cya everyone, singaporeans see ya soon. :D

The man i want to be.....

2005-09-25T20:40:00.000+08:00

past few days have been tough for me, well the past few weeks actually. having friends like Rie and Marian has made me think alot, but not just hanging out with them, but they way they are has taught me alot about the person i want to be, even if they don't agree that they have made a huge influence on my life, they have more than they think, far far more......

its really difficult to set ur self a goal and achieve it in reality, and for me i set my self the goal of being the man i want to be, its hard to explain but i know the man i want to be and for my frineds hopefully i can show them whom i want to be, but becoming that person is much harder than just saying it. my life is filled with responsibilities day after day, either being minor or major it doens't matter, i have duties to fulfill and i should do them, i mean wat kind of man would i be if i simply disregarded my duties to my family and my self, and go off with my friends and have a good time, i wish i could but simply life isn't that simple. there will always be excuses on why a certain situation is different, but i need to look past that, see the big picture..... i've got to see that God comes first, then my family then my friends, having a good time with my friends is not a luxury rather a privilege. i've got to see that after i have completed my duties then i can have a good time.

Its times like these that i thank i have God, that in my darkest times he is always there, but when it is my happiest times as it has been these past weeks, he is also there for me to share my joy with him, but also providing me such loving friends for me to share my joy with, and a loving family to be there for me and keep me in check all the days of my life.

My life must change........

2005-09-21T18:14:00.000+08:00

Sorry fellas, haven't been blogging for a while, the internet has been cut off, so finally it is up and running

well past few days have just been more unpacking and unpacking, we had a garage sale, and tried to sell alot of our old stuff, wasn't too bad i guess, still alot of left over things, so will be having another one this weekend. got to meet some interesting people, even our neighbour behind us hehehe.

anyway we've gotten some like building tools now, like a able saw, angle grinder, jig-saw and some other things, so we've been building and building stuff in our house, trying to improve the place and make more room, we just finished a kitchen feature so now we can like hang things on it, and cos we are renting the place, we weren't able to attach to the main counter, so we had to engineer the shelf to be supported by its own weight and be stable, so its been done pretty well, most of it is like Jarrah nice strong wood.

on like tuesday was feeling a bit down, personal reasons. but as if an angel sent by God himself, Rie called me up on her break between classes, she was on her way to East perth for an excursion thingy, she called just to say hi and all... i mean i felt so much better. Nothing better than having someone so nice and caring give u a ring just to say hello. Rie if ya reading this u truely are a gift sent by God, Thanks so much for being a friend! u gonna get a nice big hug now hehehe. and remember to make ur hair in to those Chun Li buns hehehe. remember u owe me :p

This u see people is one of the down sides to coming to perth for a short period of time. I came here and met people like Rie and Marian, and now i have to leave so soon. and possible won't see Rie every again! i'll truely miss a friend like her, but being here also makes me miss my friends in singapore. so when i'm leaving singapore i miss them so much aswell. but when i'm in singapore i miss my friends here. y can't eveyone just live in one place! well one day we will all be living and dining at one table ;)

There are always ups and downs of coming to a place other than home, and meeting new people and growing to cherish their friendship is truely a gift, that no one can take away.

To all the people in singapore and to al the people in perth i miss u all so much and cherish every moment i get to be with u all! the loneliest time of my life in when i'm on the plane :D neither here nor there but in the middle torn between the ones i love :(

Is this me??

2005-09-17T01:17:00.000+08:00

You are the sort of person that needs a peaceful environment. You seek release from stress and freedom from conflicts and disagreements, of which you seem to have had more than your fair share. But you are taking pains to control the situation by proceeding cautiously and you are right in doing so as you are a very sensitive person.
You are a true extrovert, frivolous and outgoing. You need to feel in control of any situation. If matters are not proceeding according to plan you tend to get extremely irritable and perhaps become difficult to live with.
Being a very proud individual, you tend to hold yourself aloof pretending that you are stoical - indifferent to pain and pleasure. This is not so, for in truth you are an extremely emotional individual, one that may make a hasty decision and perhaps regret it at leisure. It is time now to break the bond of detachment and be the 'you' that you would like to be - give vent to your emotions and enjoy yourself.
It is said that we are all influenced by our environment and indeed you are no exception. It would seem at this time that even though you may be surrounded by people, you are experiencing an inner loneliness. Fortunately you are sufficiently strong minded to realise that life has a great deal to offer you and that you may miss your share of experiences if you fail to make the best use of every opportunity. You therefore pursue your objectives with a fierce intensity and are prepared to commit yourself deeply and readily. You believe that whatever you would like to do or think 'you can do' - you do! It is because of this attitude that you may be considered by others as arrogant and even conceited, but its fair to say that whatever it is that you really want out of life you will put your heart and soul into it and will not take 'NO' for an answer.
You have so many ideas that you would like to revitalize but you need to realize a stable and peaceful condition to do so. Once you can free yourself from all the aggravation and tension around you, you will make strides that may amaze you. You will not be prevented from achieving all the things you so desire.

http://www.colorgenics.com/sps/

Is this really me?? i guess only i will know that answer......

anyway today went to church, was really good, i needed it so badly i missed church for like 1 week, felt so away from God that whole time, i needed to get back into the path of righteousness. anyway the message was good, different, it was based on the prodigal son story, but this time it went in another direction and focused on the brother rather than the son that was lost and now found.

After church is always a delight, hanging out with Rie and Marian. only been like 2 weeks and i feel like i've known them for years and years. i'm really gonna miss them. Rie and Marian if ur reading this missin ya gals already :) oh still waiting on those muffins btw :D.....
Its always nice to have a chat and just relax. was feeling a bit down today, sad, but just hanging out with them and being in church made me all happy again. so thanks u gurls! much appreciated :D......

anyway i'd better head off, have a shower, blah blah blah then head to bed.... some more unpacking tomorrow i think we got to build a few shelfs to fix in our house :D i love working with tools love making stuff

seeya all later, God bless ya all!

Pseudo Self

2005-09-15T22:30:00.000+08:00

haven't been blogging for a bit, been moving house so beenrally busy and tired. past week non stop driving back and forth lifting and assembling and painting and repairing. very very tiring.
but finally we have sorta settled in our new house that we are renting, and finally have got the net set up! FINALLY! so here i am blogging.

anyway past few weeks actually the time since i came to perth i have felt the difting of my self from God. even thouhg i am going to church and all and meeting new people, and still experiencing the love of God and his people, i still feel like i'm drifting away, and i don't like this feeling, i want to be closer i don't want to be away, but i can't help but feel this way. God i need ur help.

the past week i haven't really had any quiet time to my self, but today since we finally sorta settled down i could just sit and think somethin i had been longing to do, sit in a quiet area and just think by my self, being so tired i really needed it. and i just thought about how i am, the person i am. i feel happy aout the person i have become, but also dissappointed aswell, the idea of 'no one is perfect' to me is a lame excuse for hiding the truth, i know and feel i can do better be better than i am. but at wat cost? sigh.... burdens on my mind just pound and pound upon me day after day. how much longer can i hold on. putting up this person to the world, trying to be happy day after day to the people around me so they also feel happy. I'd feel even worse putting my burden upon them, making their day worse because i'm feel bad. sigh... some people just odn't understand, even if they say they do, they don't know everything, my life story, even if i tell them , they stil own't know the pain and suffering, the disappointments, the sacrifice, the backstabbing, the dark clouds that rain down upon me, the skeletons in my closet. how could they ever understand.

when i was thinking, i thought about me and my brothers, we are really close like really really close. but its weird cos they don't know me. and i don't know them. i mean we know each other as family, but they don't know me outside, the person i am to my friends. i mean they care and all, they scold me for my own good, but sometimes they just odn't know wats going on in my head, not the things i do but the things i feel, they just don't understand, but i wonder y i put this other me infront, not letting them see......

sigh..... life goes on, i should thank god i am still here. more than i should.....
night everyone

Finally we get the HOUSE!!

2005-09-10T00:09:00.000+08:00

THANK GOD SO MUCH!! we finally got a house secured, now we are transfering our stuff across to the new house. it look sooooooo nice! with a big backyard, and a shed, so we can store stuff, and we can use it as a workshed, and build some stuff!. So i wanna thank god for even in the times of heart ache and soul cursing, he is true and loving, bring this house to us to move into brings joy to me and my family.

today was the day my grandma and my uncle flew back to singapore. also another thing to thank god for. they are finally out of my way. very troublesome, trying to stay calm and being respectful when full of anger just waiting to burst out at them. but even though they treat us this way, i keep them in my prayers that they come to jesus in a more loving way, and become true christians, and love him, and follow him in the ways of good. i can't say i'm perfect but i know for my self that i try to live by the word and try to be a good person, at times i do become a complete idiot and piss people off, we all do. and for me its to not be so much like that and be more like God.

well i'd better go to sleep, gonna wake up early and go for a kick with my bro ben, then do some more packing then unpacking, then got to go and pick my bro cal up from the airport, so 3 bros in perth to help with th emoving yay! just missing one other brother, oh well

night all cya around

~To Err is Human, but to FORGIVE, DIVINE~

2005-09-08T01:41:00.000+08:00

This post although shows it as Thrusday 8th Sept its for 7th Sept cos its a bit late.....

Just got back from picking my brother up from the airport, he is here to help with us moving the house over. so dark driving all the way down there. dark lonely roads. Thank God for the music hehe. can't live with out music.

Anyway this morning didn't start off to well. got woken up by a pissed of uncle, searching through my bed with a flash light looking for a phone, and i was half a sleep! he came barging in saying where is the phone, i just through to my self, one of my grandmothers recruits. a weapon of her own dirty work. we had taken most of the phones to pack away so we can start shifting things, but our grandmother starts barking orders, inquiring of where HER phone is. first of all, we paid for the phone, and we paid for the phone bill, while she can go and huff and puff and complain to her friends about me and my family. but not only that she uses OUR phone and OUR phone line to call overseas to bad mouth MY FAMILY! and i just had to be freakin walking past her room to hear her whispers...... and DEAR GOD I WISH I HADN'T..... i was so furious...... HOW DARE SHE SAY SUCH THINGS! SHE ISN"T EVEN A GRANDMOTHER! HOW DARE SHE.................. moving on. so my uncle after not finding a phone in my bed ~duh~ i hope there isn't a phone in my bed i'd be owrried. he began demanding the handphone that my grandmother had given to me as a gift! now she is demanding it back! i mean HOW FREAKIN PETTY CAN U GET. its such an example of how she gave me and my brothers this house, as a gift, and now she is taking it back! i think they need put a entry into the dictionary. Indian Giver: Nancy Ng.

anyway me and the uncle had an argument, over these petty things and he began to try and stand in my way when my grandmother went to my fathers private office and used our phone to make overseas calls! i bascially said this is my fathers private office, accord him the respect and leave. she said this is my house, and i can do wat i want with it! oh i wanted to seriously just give her a slap. i had to hold back so much from lashing out. then to cap it off when i go to leave, the uncle stands in my way with his smug face, and challenges me "you got a problem with that huh?" and gives me a bumb. i mean if i had a meter of my furiousness it'd be through the roof and smashed the moon. i just wanted to sorry to say beat the living shit out of him! BUT... thanks to being saved by the good graces of God, i did other wise and left it. and walked away, nothing good will prosper from using violence. last resort.

Anyway finally my father arrived back, and while i was copying out the contact numbers from my hand phone cos i had to give the phone back, my father had a "chat" with my uncle and they got into an argument. but praise God, my dad cooled him self down adn talked to my uncle better, and vola, wat do u know my uncle is being used by my grandmother and he doens't even know it. she just happily forgot to tell my uncle that the phone was ours, the phone bill was ours. the thing he was fighting for was a freakin lie! and that is only the beginning.. it was the beginning of it all sinking it into my uncle's brain. pieces coming together and he soon to understand. for my grandmother she drove everyone in her family away from her, by her paranoia and theft. she drove all her sons and daughters away, even my mum. but my mum 'loved' my grandmother and even though everything my grandmother does to my mother, she still goes back and does the hard work for her. with 1 arm and a disabled leg, she made the whole garden and made sure the plants grew, not for 1 house BUT FOR 2 HOUSES!. and no thanks, rather my mother gets the things such as we are taking advantage of my grandmother and just using her.

anyway.. after i cooled off. i decided to go back to my uncle and apologise. even if i trying to get the point over to him that he is being used. i did it in a inproper and disrespectful manner, and there is no excuse for my behaviour. as an elder i should accord him respect disreguarding any past events, i must have principles, and principles i live by. I said sorry to him, and he accepted my apology and not only that he said sorry back to me! and we parted on good terms! how forgivness can be the ultimate solution! (but not always, ignorance is bliss) Plus after i am in good terms with him, and with wat my father said to him, the points will further drill into him brain. and hopefull his eyes will open and see my grandmother for what she truly is.

that is the events of just today, a small glimspe of wat has been happening to my mother and my father for the past 10 years, while me and my brothers lived by my parents, and even though they lived through this hell hole that my grandmother put them through, they still told us to love our grandparents and give them security. we are old enough now and we are putting a stop to it! she thinks we want her money. sure we are in financial troubles! we have God on our side and no enemy can defeat us, with the faith we have in God! He is my shepherd, "though i walk through the valley of death, i shall fear no evil; for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff shall comfort me"(Psalms 23:4), her money is nothing, her money can't buy our love, we gave her our love, and she accused us of thefting her of her money.

This is the beginning of the end. but our lives will go on. and i shall praise God in watever i do. never shall i curse god, for her allows me to live, he brought me to this world, and at his will he will take me from this world to live in eternity by his side. Till that day i will praise him for all he has done, and all he will do.

Good night. To Forgive is Divine...........

Moving....

2005-09-05T21:48:00.000+08:00

oh... so sad..... leaving a house in which u worked so hard and watch ur family also work so hard to build and make wat was a house in to a home... destroyed by the ignorance of relatives. but enough of that, wat is done is done, hopefully they can learn from their mistakes, and i can learn from my mistakes, what doesn't kill me will only make me stronger. and in God i'll seek refuge...

well today we went around to the house we are lookign to rent. a nice and cosy house, witha nice big back yard. so good for like a bbq and all! very nice. we've put the application in. so hopefully we will learn of our fate tomorrow.

OMG so amazing! my brother prayed for another one of my brothers. although to some it doens't seem like a big thing, but to me it is! my brother has u could say back slided a huge way, thats if he was every intouch with god from the beginning. we were brought up in a christian family, going to church with the family etc . so we were sorta born to be christian. as for me i only really came to christ fully at the beginning of the year. i was always on and off. never really fully in touch with god. until i met people like, birdy, lucas, bro tan, andy, selena (sorry can't mention everyone), people who were truely intoouch with god, and showed me the way to be, and showed me in my eyes the person i want to be. but most of all my mother helped me come close to god, she never gave up in her search for knowledge of god. but my brother has backslided very far. and for me to see him pray for my brother, not only strengths my faith, but puts unimaginable force behind his prayers. and God do we need it.

it always hurts when u see friends in pain, in need, and yet its so hard to do anything, and make the choice of whether to do anything at all. all i can do is pray for guidance, and to pray for right words to give. but when the person come out of their pain, the fulfillment of ur contribution is paramount to the effort u put in. for people out there with friends in need, sometimes a hug is all u can give, but hug can mean more than u could imagine.

God bless everyone. Good night. the polar bear signing off :D

2005-09-05T01:06:00.000+08:00

Interesting huh!
~polarBear~

Hmm would i have a daughter???

2005-09-03T19:07:00.000+08:00

today was a bit of a sad day but also a pretty col day too! in the morning/afternoon went with Marian to watch Rie perform at her karate thingy. but she gave us freakin wrong directions or should i say wrong destination. lol so we ended up driving up and down in the wrong place! so we had to call people and we found our way there intime to watch her perform! Man she was awesome! so much better than i expected! small people packed with huge punch! yes she's little well not little but she was awesome heh! she moved way cool! with the sword and all, better not get on her bad side :S.

after that i dropped Marian and Rie home but first had to play taxi and pick up Rie's cousin Sam. i think thats his name not 100% sure :s. anyway he from singapore too. finished army and everything. anyway took them home, then i stayed and viewed some interesting things!! hmmm like.... better not mention right Rie! somethings hanging in the around :P. don't worry didn't see much! lol. after that they went of to go shopping to buy some like muffin mix and go bake muffins for fathers day! lol. after that went to joondalup to grab some stuff then headed home. to a little bbq, a way of us breaking the news to our neighbours that we are leaving cos of the crazy grandmother. yeah tears and all were around. but we still had a good time, quite a few drinks passed around though lol. but it was cool i got to play daddy! well sorta. my old guardian's daughters were there and they are SOOOOOOOO cute!!! serious!. 1 is like 5 or 6 or somethin and the other is really really young don't know specifically. but. Emi is the elder one and Coco is the younger one. they are soooo cute!. Well emi was running around in our garden and stepped on pooped. so i had to take her to our shower and wash her feet and all and dry her. the she is so cute, she gave me a hug and all and said thank you. but then she did it AGAIN so i had to clean her again and dry her again lol and she hugged me and thanked me again! she is so cute. i'd love to have a daughter. then Coco she is even cuter!!! she came in and saw me cleaning Emi's feet and after that she wanted me to carry her., and she just looks so cute with the way she asks cos she can't talk yet so she like just lifts up her hands and smiles and jumps around! how can u resist that!!!. so i carried her around, its so cute when she smiles, makes me feel cool! making someone smile is always good :) well they had to leave so sad, and Coco wanted me to carry her to the car lol, so i carried her in and put her in the car, then her mum went to put the seat belts on to her but she like jumped around and refused! lol she wanted me to put them on! i was like OMG SOOO CUTE!!!! so i did it and she put her arms out to hug me omg i'd love to have a daughter only problem is when they grow up! they have boyfriends, omg i'd never let a single boy touch her! or go within a few feet of her! none of them would ever be good enough!!! but i'd love to be daddy and have adaughter eventally. well thats my night so far! but at like 7:30-8 our neighbour is havin a party cos he's birthday is like on monday, so they asked us to come along, but the mum and dad wont' be coming don't think so i'll walk over i guess. have a few drinks! i'm 18 already so its ok hehhehehe. good being 18 just makes life easier heh!

anyway i'd better be off, hope the 6 pack of crownies are cold still hehehe. catch ya all later! have a great night, and god bless! whoo church tomorrow looking forward to it already!

Y does family have to be difficult? is this even family???

2005-09-02T00:46:00.000+08:00

Sigh...... y does life have to make everything so miserable. wait thats right, life doesn't make everything so miserable, WE DO! sigh..... well today is a sad day. but also a day for triumph if u want to look at it that way. after years and years of torment from my grandmother, of our whole family. after she bascially pushed my grandfather to his death (literally although she denies it) she still has no heart to even take care of her grand children. She explains that she IS taking care of us children but its our parents that make her do the things she does! i mean what the hell! and she has the nerve to say my mother isn't brought up well??? SHE IS YOUR FREAKIN DAUGHTER! u;ve gone crazy woman! right now the tally is 2! thats right 2 crazy gand mothers! geez! and both my grand dads were awesome men! and they had freakin weird ass wifes! my god i'm never gonna find a wife like that!

Sigh... as a result we've confronted her, and she uses the house she built for "US" a gift she says against us in so many ways, making us bascialyl beg for wat we by right deserve! well we've had enough! she can deal with everything! see how she handles it! We are moving out of the house, "our" house our "gift" house, yeah right.. all this house has given us is stress and stress. we've painted, furnished, floored, swept, we've done everything from the beginning, to save her the money! and she says we do nothing. what kinda bs is that!

Humph... after getting that out! yes it isn't right to be like this and so harsh to this woman they called my grand mother. but words of reason do not enter her brain. she thinks of 1 way. everyone wants her money! and the stupid thing is that she believes that her family is trying to get her money even more than her "friends"??? wat the? even trying to reason with her in the Good words of the gospel!

"Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast your pearls before the swine, lest haply they trample them under their feet, and turn and rend you."Matthew 7:6

that is wat i say to u! and it is so true in the case, everything we suggest to her for her and our greater good, if it doens't go the way we planned it is our fault! and if she does somethin that makes it her fault she so conviently forgets......

arghhhhh that woman drives me wild! but the most past that gets me the most upset is that she stresses my mother out! she takes everyone out on my mum who i love dearly! how can i stand aside and watch my mother be trampled by her OWN MOTHER! what kind of man i to be if i would permit such a awful thing!

In god's good grace, and unconditional love i seek refuge, for that is all i have in the darkest times of my life, for he is the only one that can truly see where my heart burns and aches....

We have to live to the future but keep sight of the Present

2005-09-01T00:03:00.000+08:00

Well today was a bit hectic in a way, driving people around everywhere, but my day started off lol with a troubling wake up, a cute but troubling wake up lol. i woke up with our 6 month old Lab licking my face hehehe. spoilt my dream when i found out it was dog :s oopz said to much already :p jks jks....... or am i????? hehe

anyway the day continued with me having to chat to this e-wire dude they are the company setting up the whole neighbour hood with like fibre optic cables and giving all of us broadband yay!. but the cool thing is that with the property we get given the broadband with 6 months free internet service at 2mbit speed!! wow! but not only that we are supposed to get this thing called video on demand, where u can select the videos and watch them on ur tv, like u can choose them and u get them!! we get that for liek 4 months to try out, but also ur also supposed to be able to surf the web and they give u a keyboard or some device to do it! how cool is that! but they are runnign slow :s so by the time i leave perth they will prob only just be getting it :S

anyway after that i had to drive the family to the city where we had Dim sum yummmmm..... for lunch. then had to go to the airport to pick up me dad, then all the way back home! and on the way back home the usual chatter from the dad about the business and where we are taking it, etc etc.... usual dad talk. i guess he is write, the way me and my brothers are running the company, we really should get a move on and look to the future, i mean with a launch just over in malaysia we got to get following up on our clients and to be clients huh! so i guess we have a lot of work ahead of us, but as for me my work had just arrived on a plane. we and me dad are gonna be learning to program :s, supposed to take over the comapny's systems huh.... pretty hard. but some body has to do it. but its always hard to keep focus so many things i want to do, other than sit there and program, looking at lines after lines after lines of code and code and code. but pray to god he will give me the will power to concentrate. and to look at the future of our company and the future of my life and how i want to live it!

anyway i'm signing off to talk to Rie now hehehe.. yeh u prob reading this aren't u don't forget to comment! see ya on friday right!! i hope i can make it!! if not sunday aswell k!

You lose some you gain some.......

2005-08-30T23:16:00.000+08:00

This post is a bit sad but also a very happy post!

The sad part is i only just found out that Brother Tan's father past away on sunday.. its so sad to lose some one. i also lost my grandfather a couple of years back. all the regrets of not doing as much all things i wished i said, but never realised till it was to late. Brother Tan you have my prayers, now and forever...

On a happier side, gaining new friends is also a great thing to have, a awesome gift that god has given us hehe. after my frist service at Sunset coast, i just had a "stomp" session which is like the youth group thingy. it was very entertaining, and met some very interesting people, such as princess fiona hehe, and Rie and Marian lol :D met some other guys like Adin, Ross, jarryd to name a few. geez always hard to remember all the names of people u meet. especialyl when coming to a new church, remind me jus tthe first day i came to city harvest, swamred my friendly people, shaking hands with so many people, making the brain work over time to keep up. whew! lol and its happening again.

its so sad that i can't stay longer here, and be part of this church also. but while i'm apart of this church making friends here. i miss my friends in singapore, from city harvest, but i know when i go back to singapore i'll miss my new found friends here... life is always complicated. but now i've got friends everywhere, and hope we can keep in touch. thatnks to the glory of god heh!

anyway i'm signing off....

"Citius, Altius, Fortius"

When is enough really enough??

2005-08-29T16:15:00.000+08:00

On sunday went to a new church near our area. it was called Sunset Coast CLC. it was set up by a couple of pastors from Hillsongs church in sydeny. The general gist of the service was alot similar to that of City Harvest just on a really really really smaller scale. its a fairly new church but still full of life and the presence of God. Anyway i started to meet a few people, alot of the youth, most of the people thought that i was around mid 20's so i kept getting introduced to the really older people than me. in fact i only met 1 person that was around my age, her name was sophie if i remember correctly she was 19, stil older though. my mum thought she was like 14 yrs old or something hehehe.

Anyway the guys i met at the church invited me to join them at this thing called Dark Light. which is like a laser game, where u ahve like packs on you and a gun and u run around in a maze type arena and shoot each other. it was great fun. and good to get to know the people there. we played the first game in teams, there were bout 30 of us. came like 8th i think. this army dude came first he killed everyone. but we played a second game but only 10 of us played again so we made it more interesting, the last game had sounds from our guns and music, plus the lights around and the lights on our packs, so we made it more intesting and chose a game called stealth. bascially its just pitch black, no lights on packs, no lights in the arena, no music, and no sound effects. so bascailly u had to walk/run around quitely and shoot people, u know when uget shot cos it lights up only for a second. it was hard, u could hear people walking and running, but also funny cos u could hear people running into the walls cos the walls are also all black hehehe.

well wat is he title got to do with the laser game and everything well nothing actually it refers to this, just some thoughts and stuff i've been having, not just today but like past few years. its more to do with relationships, like not just relationships i with the your partners but relationships with ur family. where do u draw the line? when do u decide to give up on everything. for example in trying to find a relationship when do u stop chasing a girl and just give up? do you ever? so many questions draw us to the conclusion that we should just stop, where the girls always leave hints and clues but never really anythign straight forward, so how do we know, we just want a straight answer!!! we sacrifice so much for a girl yet sometimes the girl is oblivious that they don't realise, how the small things to them are big things to us. where do we stop and cut our losses? should we? even with our relationships with our family, they do so much, we hate we love. we all know in a family love has no boundaries, but how much can u allow ur family to come into ur life? just incase "family" includes like relatives, inlaws etc. but even with the close family members how much can you tell them? how much can you trust them really? to them somethings seem small and not important but can mean a great deal to us.

"Illegitimis non carborundum." (Latin)
-Gen. Joseph Stilwell

Where to Begin??

2005-08-27T18:44:00.000+08:00

Well this being my first post, its always hard to figure out wat u want to say, and when u finally figure out wat u want to say, u got to take time to figure out how to say it?? Dilema we all face, and we conquer or else there would be no blogging right!

Anyway i guess i'll recap wat happened over the week. Living is australia has its ups and downs. ups being meeting new friends and of course old friends. well last sat went to the Australia Vs South Africa rugby match cos i got a free ticket as my old school 1st XV Rugby team was playing and a good friend gave me his ticket! so was awesome thanks and praise to the big guy up there :D. anyway while i watched the rugby matches it hurt so bad.... missing my rugby for so long it hurts! the longing to just run on the field and play some ball!! most people think its just a big bully's game, barbarians games. i'll have u all know that it was played by the british and seen as a gentlemen's game! HA! me gentlemen Ahem... some doubt :P. In the end of the game australia lost by 3 points!! only 3!!! thats just a field goal for people who don't know!! the same amount of points that Good ol Johnny kicked to win the world cup from australia!! darn the poms :P no offense or anything..

After that we had a rugby party, the rugby team invited me to come along for all times sake! met some new people. met a few girls :) hehe.. nah but main thing bout it was just kicking back and have a good ol yarn heh! nothin like good old cold brew with some friends

Other than that party and the rugby the only "exciting" thing that has happened was our neighbours that live over the road from our house have been having like lots of fights and stuff. they are Aborigines.. not being racist or anything but a large population of them are "Bad" i mean i got lots of Aboriginal friends just alot of them are bad for society like the bunch living over the road. anyway the first incident was they usually get pissed(drunk) then start fighting or somethin, a few weeks ago they put a brick through the neighbours car that lives on our left hand side. and our neighbour on our right hand side the aborigines like shouted and harshed them from out side. that was incident No1. now for incident No2 :S..... this happened like on thursday(27th Aug) night one of the Abo's got thrown out of the house and they were fighting and everything, then he went crazy and jumped through our neighbours master bed room window!!!!!!.. lucky the wife and the kids were lying there but they decided to move to the lounge room! whew praise god again.... it was their last warning before so... they might be kicked out i dunno.. but wat i praise god for is that, for all who don't know my mother is disabled. and its just me and her staying in the house. and to god's good grace the abo's attacked both houses on our left and right but did not put a scratch on our house! So i thanks god for his protection!!

Thats all for the first post!
Night

2005-08-26T15:01:00.000+08:00

Sleepy Doggy

My First Post :D

2005-08-26T13:41:00.000+08:00

Well this is the first post, of many to come i guess... a bit bored so decided after people prompting me to get a blog so here is the beginning :D